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The Fight

Last night The Fight happened. If you’re married you know the one I am talking about. There I was thinking I was in the right being attacked somewhat, so I responded harshly with my Wife who was just trying to offer me a little help and share her concern for me.
I should have seen it happening, my reaction to the situation was like the pushing of the big red button…. Boom, I had nuclear war in my living room.

The biggest stink about it: was that I was totally to blame, it was totally my fault. I had created a situation that stressed me out, someone was trying to help and I offended her out of pride and selfishness.

My wife was about done with a discussion we were having (about my health) and she asked me if I understood what was in a report full of medical shorthand. My big fat mouth spewed the words, “Of course I understand it… I not stupid you know!” That’s when the Fight started.

An hour and 20 minutes later we calmed down and she reminded me that as the priesthood leader of the family it was my responsibility, my duty, to look after the spiritual wellbeing of home and all who dell there, and to promote peace.
She was right, and the fact that I had failed in this pursuit, was the biggest blow of all.
If it were Nuclear War in the preceding hour, this was like a comet to my bloated head, crushing my ego, and blasting apart my pride. She was so right. I was so wrapped in my own worries, and selfish wants, that I neglected my duty and Family.

Sometimes out of war we find peace. In peace we can examine truth, and in examining truth we may find humility and honesty.
Pride never brought about peace, at least not without war first.

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I am a relatively new father.  Although my child is less than 18 months old,  I’d say I have about 2 years of experience, as that is when started making changes for the new addition to our family.

In pondering over the impact upon my life the little bundle has brought, I sometimes feel humbled and honored to be a father.  But mostly, I feel, overwhelmed at the majesty Heavenly Father is showing through the intricate fabric that makes up a person.

In my humility I often wonder if I am the right choice to be “Father,” or “Dadda” as my son calls me.  I look at the year behind me now and see missed opportunities and small lessons poorly taught, but also there are some soft moments, quiet in their unpredictable way that shine as momentous  occasions of perfection in our relationship. Dad and son on a spontaneous walk in the morning sun, The Guys hanging out, or the small restful times in the middle of the night,  bottle held tightly between a gaping smile as my boy breaks from his slurping just to see if I’m still watching him.  Minute moments that I would not trade for anything.

I wonder if I had these times with my Dad, and then I think of the times I can remember: From the lectures correcting my ill-behavior, to special trips, to family outings to the woods, it goes on and on, but with each I can see something I learned from my Dad.  I think that is part of the core of a father or dad, to teach.  Even if we do not actively try to teach some lesson, our actions are there to do it for us… if we want that lesson taught or not.

I wonder what lessons my actions will teach. What can I teach my son?   What lessons can I promote and be active about? What should I as Dad be teaching?

This leads me to the question of this Post:

Dads: What good things do/did you teach you children?

All: What is the best thing your father/dad taught you?

What are some of the best things a dad could teach their kid?

 

God bless you all,

Ditchu  April 2009

 

I saw this post and as it relates I just had to add this Link:

http://markivor.wordpress.com/2009/06/15/a-real-man/

I urge any man (not just Dads) to follow this link and watch the video.

 

God bless you all,

Ditchu June 2009

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